What They Don’t Tell You out About Pregnancy

What They Forgot To Tell You About Pregnancy

 

  • What it feels like to have your ribs used as footrests…from the inside.
  • That sometimes it appears like you have a strange alien creature with 10 arms and legs about to burst out your belly button…ewww!!
  • That you will probably want to go out and buy a box of adult diapers for the amount of times you end up peeing in your underwear while coughing, sneezing, laughing or throwing up.
  • That by the end of your pregnancy, you will need a forklift to help get you off the couch or bed (or at least one really strong person).
  • That even the silliest of things will make you cry your eyes out.
  • See our article on emotional changes during pregnancy.
  • How many times you will have to call the doctor about all your super embarrassing female questions.
  • That the toilet will become your new “best friend” or “second home” for at least one reason or another.
  • That you don’t really know the meaning of a full bladder until you’ve had to do an ultrasound….or been kicked there from the inside.
  • How bad those mood swings really can be…watch out everyone!
  • That you will get so big, you will have to stand sideways when washing dishes, doing laundry or brushing your teeth.
  • That everybody else around you apparently is a pregnancy expert, especially your mother in law.
  • That you won’t be cutting your own toenails for quite a few months if you can’t get anyone to help you.
  • Forget about shaving for quite a while too…unless you REALLY trust your partner!
  • That it becomes really hard to squat over the toilet with all that extra weight…talk about good leg exercises!
  • That the simplest of things, like walking up a flight of stairs or walking to get the mail, would make you feel like you really need a nap.
  • That people suddenly feel like they have the right to rub and pat your growing belly…like it’s not attached to the rest of you.
  •  That the word “discharge” would become a common part of your vocabulary….and the scary thing is…you won’t be embarrassed!
  •  That they just don’t make sexy bras in DD’s. It’s all about support, support and more support!
  •  Sexy underwear…you can forget those too! Comfort and cotton…that’s it!
  •  That you will never look at your husband quite the same again.
  •  That your breasts start leaking BEFORE the baby is even here yet.
  •  That you will cry when strangers say to you, “any day now?”, when you are only 6 months along.
  •  That whoever coined the term “morning sickness” didn’t know what they were talking about. What it should be named is “morning, midday, afternoon, evening and night sickness”.
  •  What it actually feels like to be kicked or headbutted in the cervix..owww!!
  •  That rolling over in bed from one side of your body to the other is a huge chore requiring lots of huffing and puffing.
  •  That the sleepless nights begin BEFORE the baby is born.
  •  That you had better buy some slip on shoes for when you get real big…unless you are going to have someone around to tie your shoes for you.
  •  That you will spend so much time cleaning and recleaning the same exact things over and over again in preparation for the baby’s arrival.
  •  That you won’t care how much of a pig you look like when you gobble down your second full plate of food…much to every one’s amazement!
  •  That memory is…..darn it! What was I going to say?
  •  That you can both hysterically laugh and hysterically cry within the same few moments.
  •  That your sense of smell is a lot better than it used to be, especially when it comes to the things that make you nauseous.
  •  That you will start to break out in pimples like you are going through puberty all over again.

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