I headed to the Doctor for my 37 week appointment feeling pretty crappy. Ya know, the usual pregnancy stuff. Super swollen, nauseous, headache, etc. At my 36 week appointment I joked around with my doctor that maybe my blood pressure would skyrocket by the next appointment and I'd get to have him sooner than the induction date of October 5Th. Little did I know that it would actually happen.
The nurse weighed me (my favorite part of the entire appointment...) and then sat me down to take my blood pressure. 140/100!!!!! I about had a heart attack. She took it again and it was 137/101. She looked at me like I just might explode any second and told me that I would probably be having a baby that day. Now, I know I joked around about wanting to have him and not wanting to be pregnant anymore, but hearing that sent me into a panic. I went into the room to wait for the doctor and was almost in tears because I was so nervous.
During my pregnancy with Mara my blood pressure was pretty much out of control from 21 weeks on. Luckily we were able to control it somewhat with medication. During this pregnancy my blood pressure did indeed raise at 21 weeks, but it went back to normal after a little while so I didn't need to be put on medication. It was nice to have a normal pregnancy. I think that was why I got so freaked out when I saw those numbers on the screen.
My doctor came in the room and told me he needed to send me over to the hospital ASAP and have me do an NST and get labs drawn. Now, I did this at least once a week when I was pregnant with Mara so I knew the drill...but as I left the office I did start crying. I composed myself a little and called Sean to explain the situation to him. I just knew I was going to have him that day and I was not ready yet. I then called my mom and let her know that if this...if that...if when...(you get the point) she would leave work and take care of Mara so Sean could come and be with me.
I arrived at the hospital and got hooked up to the machines, my blood pressure was indeed still psycho and the contractions I was constantly feeling were pretty big ones. The nurse told me that when you can see four contractions on the screen at a time it means that you're most likely in active labor, and I was there. When my doctor checked me at the appointment I was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced, so I knew the contractions were doing something.
They drew the labs (that's a story in and of itself...stupid nurse had just graduated nursing school and did a number on my arm, it was awesome.) Then it was just a waiting game. I had forgotten just how boring it is to get an NST. During the entire thing my phone was buzzing off the hook from worried friends and family waiting for updates.
Then the news came: it was time to have a baby. My doctor came in and told me that my liver function was being effected because of the blood pressure making this officially pre-eclampsia again and that I would be moving to a delivery room.
What was I feeling? A mixture of relief/stress/panic/excitement.
I walked into the delivery room to change into the lovely gown and it hit me. I was alone. It was such a strange feeling. I had never pictured being at the hospital without Sean. Oh, he got there about twenty minutes later, but it was a very weird twenty minutes.
The nurse came in to hook up my IV to start pitocin, and guess who got to do the IV?? The lovely nurse who drew my labs earlier. After having the circulation to my arm cut off for a good ten minutes (no exaggeration) to find a vein, she poked it and blood literally squirted ALL over the place. When Sean got there he thought someone had died because of the amount of blood all over. Ok, that WAS an exaggeration, but you get the point.
All of this started at about 1:45pm. After they hooked up the pitocin she asked when I'd like the epidural. I told her as soon as humanly possible would be amazing. I'm not one of those girls who want to "experience the pain". I'd rather stick with modern medicine thank you. It took 45 minutes to get the doctor in there, and I was definitely uncomfortable--but no where near the pain I was in with Mara, since I had back labor with her.
It took FOREVER to get the epidural in. He just couldn't get it placed exactly center. I could feel blood running right down my butt crack...tmi I know. And oh man did it ever hurt! Don't get me wrong, it was BEYOND worth it, but getting there was no fun at all.
My doctor told me he'd be back in in about 3 hours to break my water. They normally do it earlier but since my Group B Strep was positive I had to be on IV antibiotics for at least that long before they could break my water.
SEVEN HOURS LATER he came back. I was pretty frustrated. I know that once my water is broken I dilate super fast, but until then really nothing happens. Sure enough, I was still just at a 3. We also got to find out that he had already pooped, so that added an element of nervousness to the situation. (When Logan was born we learned that he must have already been sitting in it for a while because the umbilical cord had already soaked it up and was green too). After he broke my water things got moving, and a little less than three hours later I was dilated to a 10 and ready to push.
I pushed for 40 minutes and out he came. He was 7 pounds even and 18 inched long. Sounds like a small baby, right? Not for me. During Mara's delivery I was told that if she were any bigger it wouldn't have worked and we'd have ended up in the OR. She was only 6 lbs. 2 oz. With Logan I definitely felt the difference in size. OUCH!! I even screamed a tiny bit at the last push. It hurt SO bad!
During the labor I kept saying over and over again PLEASE don't let him end up in the NICU. That was my worst fear. No one should ever have to have that experience. The nurses and doctor kept reassuring me that everything would most likely be alright. But when he came out, I knew I wouldn't get to see him for long. I could hear the nurses saying he was grunting, and from my experience with Mara I knew that meant C-PAP. They did let me hold him for almost a whole minute before they took him. So that was nice.
Around 5:00am, he was able to join me in the room because everything was fine. I cannot even explain how happy I was.
The hospital stay was amazing. Getting to snuggle with him all day and night was really a dream come true! I could pick him up whenever I wanted--I didn't have to ask anyone. I could be the one to decide when he ate and for how long. I got to decide who could come visit. I got to take care of him from the moment he was born. Do you know how amazing that was? Right from the very start of his little life I got to be his MOM. Unfortunately a NICU stay puts off motherhood for as long as they have to stay in there. Of course the nurses and doctors tell you otherwise, but when they're holding you baby and telling you that you can't, when they're telling you when you can and cannot see the baby, and when they're making decisions about your child's care without informing you--you are not their mother.
With Mara I struggled with post partum depression really really bad. I got put on medication and things slowly improved. That made me pretty nervous that it could happen again, and unfortunately it did. Luckily this time I knew all the signs to watch for and when I knew it wasn't just the baby blues that are very common I called my doctor and got put on a higher dose of the same medication.
Which brings me to my next point: I need to seriously thank Heavenly Father for the wonderful gift of modern medicine. Without it, I most likely wouldn't have gotten to know my two amazing children. They probably wouldn't have made it, even with Logan's small breathing problem. How incredible is it that we can take care of these things! Even something like depression. I will be forever grateful for that gift.
On a lighter side note, I got a pretty big dose of narcotics when they gave me my epidural. I say pretty big because they gave me three instead of the usual one because it took so long. Needless to say it made me pretty darn crazy for a while. I said so many stupid/hilarious things. So here's an apology to anyone I might have offended. I just can't control myself while under the influence.
Congrats!!!!!!!!! WELCOME TO THE WORLD LITTLE MAN!
Quote of the Day::"When you do nothing, you feel overwhelmed and powerless. But when you get involved, you feel the sense of hope and accomplishment that comes from knowing you are working to make things better. Maya Angelou
congrats! I was wondering when you were going to tell your story :) He is sooo handsome btw. **HUGS**
I do have to laugh a bit though, the start of your hospital stay sounds a bit similar to mine... hmmm... I seriously think we had the same lab nurse. After she finally (4 tries in both wrists) got my IV in I went to the bathroom and all the sudden my hand started dripping in blood, she forgot to screw the one thing in and I sat there and bled it was all over the floor. I pulled the help string and people came running in haha that was funny. And after my NST they did they sent me to be induced because she was non responsive and i was all alone. i was scared, thank goodness we have prayer, Heavenly Father helped me a lot that day/night.
Congrats again!!
"The day you slipped away was the day I found it won't be the same" - Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne
I love your story! Congratulations! I never even thought about having a NICU baby until you posted this, you must have felt so ripped off the first time. I too agree with modern medicine and I am still thankful that I got an epidural. As for the postpartum, I am glad you knew the signs. I had the baby blues for a week or two after having Emri and I thought that I could never live feeling like that day after day. It is good to hear that you got the help you needed for both you and your newly expanded family.
Congratulations again! (and 7 lbs sounds very big for being early! Imagine if he would have went to term!!!!)
Congratulations, and I'm so happy to hear that he was well in the end! That must have been sooo exciting to be able to room-in with him, and be able to be mom right from the start. I know the NICU experience (a whole month and a day of it), and I'm really hoping I'm as lucky as you are this time around and get to keep this little one with me.
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Logan's birth Story
Posted - 11/05/2009 : 9:48:37 PM
